


TommyInnit was slain by TommyInnit using [————]

by DepressedTatertot



Series: Shit that I made on impulse [1]
Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Angst, Church Prime, Dadza, Dead TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Depression, Ghostbur, Holy Land, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Suicide, It was never meant to be, Nightmares, Sad Ending, Sad TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), The Author Regrets Everything, The Author Regrets Nothing, Tommy might have Ptsd but idk it’s not really important, but at the same time
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-10
Updated: 2021-02-10
Packaged: 2021-03-16 03:01:07
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,610
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29325114
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DepressedTatertot/pseuds/DepressedTatertot
Summary: Ok so like I wrote this because I was bored and thought “fuck it if I end up hating it I won’t post it”——Tommy off’s himself after one too many shitty days——This takes place after L’Manberg was blown up the 2nd time
Relationships: No Romantic Relationship(s)
Series: Shit that I made on impulse [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2154021
Comments: 10
Kudos: 263





	TommyInnit was slain by TommyInnit using [————]

**Author's Note:**

> Ok so ummm tw: self harm (not that descriptive because I’m a shit writer) and suicide
> 
> I will put ⚠️TW⚠️ before and after the self harm parts, but the whole story is generally suicidal so be warned
> 
> Also I had to rewrite like 600 of this because it didn’t save so that’s fun

Tommyinnit was done.

He was so fucking done with this server.

He had sacrificed very thing for it and yet he got nothing in return.

He lost his _discs_ for it

He lost his friends for it

He lost his _family_ for it

Hell, he even lost his fucking _will to live_ for it

So yeah, Tommyinnit was done with this god forsaken server. 

——

 _Today is the day_ Tommy had decided.

His day started like shit and he decide he didn’t want to see the end of it.

——

He woke up in a cold sweat. his whole body shaking. His arms ached and his head was pounding.

——

It had happened again.

He had the dream again.

It was the same dream he’s been having for years.

Ever since L’Manburg had been blown up the first time, he had been having the same god damn dream.

One in which he refused to acknowledge and refused to talk about. 

Nobody needed to know bout it.

It was his problem and he needed to deal with his problems on his own. Otherwise people would get mad at him for waisting their time over something so childish.

——

He got up from his bead, still shaking and halfway into a panic attach. He had to deal with this quickly. 

_Nobody’s going to notice. They don’t care enough to see past your facade so there’s no point in trying to hide it._

He rushed to the bathroom trying to forget his dream.

_A knife would probably care more then they ever would_

He went straight to the cabinet under the sink. He reached a shaky hand ended a spare stack of towels and grabbed ahold of a blade. 

  
⚠️TW⚠️cuts and scars  
  


He rolled up the sleeve on his left arm revealing his bare arm. _Well not so bare anymore I guess_

_—_

his arms were covered in scars and cuts. Starting at the inner elbow and ending around his wrist joint. Some from years ago and some from just the morning prior.

both the scars and the cuts ferried in size, shape, and texture. It all depended on how they were made 

_or just how desperate_ _he was_

Some were long, thin, and smooth. While other were short, jagged and so rough that it looked like he had used a serrated blade.

The older scars were faded and barely visible, mainly because when he made them he still had the will to live and cared about nerve damage.

_You didn’t need nerves anyways_

Most of his cuts hadn’t even scabbed yet. Still Fresh but not bleeding anymore

_—_

He lifted the tip of the blade to his wrist, not even caring about if he went over old cuts and scars.

_maybe try the right arm today_

He thought about it for a minuet “ya know what... fuck it... maybe a blank canvas will be nice for once”

He had never cut or purposefully damaged his right arm before. He had actually needed his right arm and it would be a whole lot more noticeable if his right arm started to get weaker. 

He quickly switched the blade from his right hand to his left and pulled up his right sleeve.

Setting the tip of the blade agains his pale smooth skin. he let out another quaking breath ad he lightly dragged the blade across his fore arm. It wasn’t enough to actually break threw the skin but it did leave a satisfying whit line.

He used the line as a guide. He pressed the blade into his skin, not yet moving it letting the feeling sink in. The felt himself calm down just from that.

_it really is different with a clean canvas. maybe it’s because these nerves actually work still_

He decided that the feeling had sunk in enough and he began to drag the blade across his arm slowly to cherish the feeling.

He could feel every little thing about the flesh he was cutting. He could feel as the knife went across more condensed parts in his muscles. He felt how his blade moved differently over the thin layer of fat on top of his muscle then it did when it cut through skin.

It stung, but it was so fucking relieving.

The fear and anxiety coursing through his body had soon turned to adrenaline as he sliced up his dominate arm.

He made more and more cuts. Only stopping when his mind felt like static and his body had stopped shaking.

He looked down at his arm and saw how it glistened with blood.

He suddenly remember all the times he had seen others covered in their own blood and his stomach dropped.

An image of Wilbur slumped over with Philza’s sword plunged through his stomach and covered in his own blood flashed threw Tommy’s vision.

Suddenly the panic and anxiety had taken over again and was desperately trying to turn on the the sink.

When he turned it on he grabbed a bar of soap and stuck his arm threw the running water. He began to frantically scrub at his arm with a combination of his fingernails and soap.

His vision was starting to get dark from both panic and blood loss.

⚠️TW OVER⚠️

——

He ended up passing out and waking up about an hour later on the floor with his faucet still running.

When he awoke, he didn’t acknowledge what had happened earlier that morning and just quickly cleaned up the remaining flood, his the blade, took a quick shower, and got ready for the day.

He was still vice president after all

——

The next thing that happened to tip him closer to offing himself was around lunch time.

He was sitting on the bench, the one him and Tubbo used to sit on and listen to his discs, eating his lunch. When suddenly he heard someone say his name from off in the distance.

he decided to go investigate it and saw that it was Tubbo talking to Ranboo. They both had huge smiles on their faces and seemed to be joking around.

Tommy’s mind supplied hundreds of reasons why they had mentioned his name, and most of them weren’t kind. Going along the lines of _probably talking shit_

He decided to ignore the situation and heading the other direction, not wanting to stay around long enough to find the truth.

——

He was bored. He didn’t really have any friends and he had finished all his work, he had nothing to do.

While was mindlessly wondering he had the amazing idea to make one of his famous cobble stone towers. He went back to his house and grabbed his netheriet pickaxe. Well it wasn’t really his, he had stolen it from someone weeks ago and had forgotten who he stole it from. But either way, it was his now and he had work to do so he headed to some random place to mine and started.

While mining a few people had stopped to say “hi” to him as they passes by but didn’t care enough to stay an have a conversation.

That was until Sapnap had stopped by.

——

“Hey Tommy! What’re you doing now?” Sapnap had said seeming to have appeared out of nowhere and scaring the shit out of Tommy.

“What the fuck Sapnap!?!? You can’t just sneak up on people! You almost gave me a fucking heart attach dick head.” Tommy shouted as he turned around to talk to Sapnap, pickaxe in hand and covered in dirt and dust.

“Geez ya don’t have to yell you gremlin.”

“I’m not a fucking gremlin, bitch boy...” Tommy retorted whispering the last part just loud enough for Sapnap to hear him.

“Sure, sure. Whatever, what are you doing though?” Sanap said completely untouched by Tommy’s words. At this point he didn’t care but he was bored and felt like messing with the kid.

“I’m mining cobblestone dip shit.” he said waving the pickaxe around as he stated the obvious.

looking closer, Sapnap realized that the pickaxe that Tommy was holding was his own. One that had disappeared from his chests months ago. It took him hours of grinding to get that pickaxe. It was netherite with maxed out enchantments so of corse he still was looking for it.

“What the fuck Tommy?!? Why the hell do you have my pick?!?” Sap shouted at Tommy. Getting ready to kill the kid if he didn’t provide a reasonable response.

”Umm, I- I didn’t know it was your’s...?” Tommy said sounding unsure of his response.

Sapnap wasn’t satisfied with that answer and got out his sword.

”To be fair I’ve had it in my chest for so long that I forgot who’s it was.” Tommy said as it that fucking helped his case.   
Sapnap was pissed and he was backed into the side of a mountain.

”Goodbye Tommy, this isn’t cannon so you’ll just respawn but if I ever see your useless ass stealing from me I’ll make it permanent.”

——

TommyInnit was slain by Sapnap using

Ranboo: Cannon

Ranboo: Cannon

Ranboo: Cannon

Ranboo: Cannon

Ranboo: Cannon

Ranboo: Cannon

Tecnoblade: 🦀TOMMY IS GONE🦀

Tubbo_: oof

Quackity: I call all his stuff

Tobbo_: No I already called dibs that years ago

Quackity: Damn

Quackity: I mean I don’t think he had anything useful, the gremlin didn’t do shit

——

When Tommy respawned he glanced down and say chat. He was on his last life and Sapnap probably didn’t say that it wasn’t a cannon kill so he was interested to see if anyone cared.

“oh... I guess they don’t care...” Tommy whispered as his mind started to fill with static and he began to feel himself slipping. He decided to type in chat to see what they would say.

——

TommyInnit: Not cannon guys... I’m still here

Technoblade: Damn it Sapnap

Tubbo_: idc I’m still going to steal you stuff :)

Ranboo: oof

Quackity: uhgg

Sapnap: He had my shot, I wanted it back I don’t really _need_ him dead _yet_

_——_

_maybe make the next message cannon_

“maybe...” he thought in response.

“But I don’t want to be a ghost... I don’t want yo be here any longer then I need to be.” the mere thought of being a ghost made him shiver thinking of what happened to Wilbur.

_church prime_

_the holy land_

That... that’s actually really smart. If you kill someone on the holy land then you get automatically perma-banned. Maybe if I kill myself i won’t be able to come back as a ghost. I’ll be forced to stay in the after life.

_do it_

All Tommy did in response to that was smile.

——

Tommy was currently preparing to kill himself. He didn’t want to be any more of a bother then he already was after he died.

He had gone through his chests and moved all of his food and any spare armor to the community house so that maybe someone could find a use for them. He filled in his basement and took all of his valuables to Tubbo’s house leaving then in a chest he brought. 

All he had left was blow up his house, fill in the hole, and place a sign saint the land goes back to it’s previous owner. 

——

Tommy places the TNT all around his house. He didn’t want to have an6 floating blocks or missed spots so he added dibble the amount he would’ve needed.

He was too out of it at the moment and his brain was too clouded for him to be triggered by the explosion. Which honestly was really load.

The only reason the sound didn’t attract anyone was because everyone was so use to Tommy’s house being grew fed out being the one greifing it that they didn’t bother to check on that area.

_they never did care did they_

Tommy quickly picked up the loose dirt ignoring the voice and filled in the home that used to be his home.

He placed the sign down, wrote the message, and burned the last of his inventory in the remaining flames from the explosion.

He was ready to go.

——

As Tommy walked to the holy land he realized that he didn’t have a way to actually hill himself there 

_you can’t even plan your wan death right can you_

He quickly thought up an ideas and started working words it. It would mean that killling himself would have to wait shortly, but that’s ok, it’ll be worth it.

——

The teen quickly gathered wood and stone and made a crafting table. He had enough stone and just enough wood to make a sword, so he did.

_give it a name_

Ok, but what would I name it? Tommy questioned the voice.

_call it ————_

Tommy smirked at the idea.

That’s going to be one interesting death message.

——

Tommy had gone to a random anvil and named his weapon. As he was heading back he had the idea to send a few messages in chat before he was gone.

so one he arrived at the holy land, he started typing 

——

_you whisper to Ph1LzA: check the holy land_

_——_

TommyInnit: Theseus might not make it long enough to exiled

Technoblade: no

Technoblade: no

Technoblade: no

Technoblade: I swear to god Tommy please tell me your not going to do what I think you’d doing

Tubbo_: wait what the hell’s going on 

TommyInnit was slain by TommyInnit using [ It was never mean to be]

Ranboo: please don’t be cannon 

Ranboo: Please don’t be cannon 

Tubbo_: oh my god...

——

Phil had rushed to the holly land after Tommy died and found the sword he used still inside of his son’s chest. Tommy had killed someone in the holy land and was never coming back. Even if that someone was himself, he would never get to come back.

——

——

——

It had been a year since Tommy had died. It had really fucked with the server.

Tubbo and Techno both blamed themselves.

Tubbo ended up giving his spot as president to Fundy. He made a cute little cottage away from the rest of the world where he could try and forget about everything.

Technoblade stayed in his house on the forest but invited Philza to move in too. The two spent the rest of their days there trying to find peace.

Ghostbur disappeared almost immediately after Tommy’s death, and everyone assumed that he was up in the afterlife with his little brother.

Ranboo’s memory made him completala forget about Tommy because it put his mind through too much stress to think about him. He really wanted to remember the boy, but he had no recollection, only secondhand storied that people had told him.

Sapnap beat himself up about it for a while because he “passed him over the edge” by killing him that day. He eventually was able to move on and him, Karl, and Quavkity made a house together just outside of the lands of the SMP living in peace.

Dream had been effected a lot surprisingly. He had been planning to mess with the boy a lot more before he died. He had planed to completely destroy Tommy and make him his pawn. Once Tommy died Dream realized how fucked up he was. He realized he needed to change. He ended up taking off his mask for the first time in years and actually became a decent human being. 

Everyone else stayed about the same but it still left them in a weird funk. Often forgetting that Tommy was dead and messaging him only for it to not work because he’s gone reminding them of the horrible reality.

——

“So Tommy, the universe was finally able to kill you...” Karl whispered.

**Author's Note:**

> I have to apologize for this being absolute shit. 
> 
> Ok so about Karl’s comment at the end.  
> There’s this one theory that Tommy was supposed to die at ever possible ark and that Karl was the one trying to keep him alive with his time travel and shit.  
> So I kind of incorporated that into it.   
> The universe finally killed to my and Karl had failed


End file.
